According to Cheatsheet, I am not allowed to wear hoodies. Also, I can’t wear patterns on my clothes; everything I wear needs to be subdued. I guess the author figures once you turn forty you have one foot in the grave already, so you should dress as if you’re going to a funeral at all times.
According the Oprah media world women over forty should never wear shorts or capris. I guess my only warm weather option is a skirt or dress, but I then have to be careful about length. Anything above the knee is considered inappropriate for my age, and anything hitting the wrong part of my calf is going to make my legs look chubby, so I guess that leaves me with full-length skirts. Wait – so there’s no warm-weather options for women over forty?
An MSN article says not only should I never wear headbands, charm bracelets, leggings with prints, wristlets, or peasant blouses, but I shouldn’t own a bulletin board or use colored pens. It’s not just about fashion, the Internet is now policing my office supplies.
Don’t get me wrong, I realize that not every outfit is suitable for every occasion. It’s probably not a great idea to wear daisy dukes and a stained t-shirt to a job interview. Wearing a bikini to church in the middle of winter doesn’t make a whole lot of sense. But these articles aren’t trying to teach us 40-somethings how to dress for a specific venue or climate. These articles are saying women over 40 should no longer feel free to wear what suits our personal preferences. They tell us getting old means we need to hide ourselves away, blend into the woodwork, disappear.
Personally I’m not a fan of sweats with the word ‘Juicy’ across the butt or shirts that put bra-straps on display. So I don’t wear them. I do not, however, discourage others from doing so. I wish people wearing sandals would clip, scrape, and lotion before exposing their nasty feet, but I’m not going to tell people what to do. If they want to let their crusty feet out in the open, that’s their business. I can look away and gag in silence.
And that’s what I wish these fashionistas out there would do when it comes to what women over forty should wear. Be silent. Hide your opinion away. Now that I’m over 40, I’m old enough to make my own decisions about what I should or should not wear.