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Warning Labels that Should Be...

4/3/2012

2 Comments

 
Everlong (Foo Fighters, acoustic version): This song is the musical equivalent to crack.

Fritos Cheese Dip in a can: Licking contents from can may be hazardous to your tongue. (The rim is sharp, people.)

Kindle Fire: Letting a four-year-old play Angry Birds on device without disabling WiFi may result in unwanted purchases.

Plants vs. Zombies: Adult diapers and a supply of energy bars and drinks will be necessary because once you start you won’t stop until you make those zombies dance.

Political Ads: Prolonged exposure will lead to nausea and disillusionment.

Recombant Bike: Using this may lead you to eat an entire can of Frito cheese dip without remorse.

Spanx: Wear this garment longer than three hours and you may need CPR.

Wii: Using game consul may cause sailor mouth-itus.

2 Comments

    Author

    Audra Middleton is a somewhat neurotic and terminally sarcastic author and mother of three from Washington State.

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