​I finally caved. My cheap throw-away flip phone is gone and I now own a smart phone. I resisted for years, because I hate them. The texting, the being constantly tethered to the Internet, the cost. It really wasn’t for me.
 
But not having a smart phone definitely had its drawbacks as well. Like it or not, the vast majority of the people in my life text. Trying to text using number keys is akin to trying to operate a rotary phone - laborious, time consuming, and inevitably infuriating. Not to mention the cost of being held hostage by group texts. I appreciate the convenience of it – like say when a coach needs to let us all know when practice is. But I could care less that little Freddy will be at practice, and without a texting plan, I really didn’t appreciate having to spend a dollar to find out. And there’s at least fifteen little Freddy’s each time. Then I’d have to spend ten minutes deleting all the “Little Freddy will be there!” messages because my phone had no storage and would constantly remind me that my memory was full and if I didn’t delete something I wouldn’t be getting messages I actually cared about. Not that I understood many of those. Texts mean nothing when you can’t pull up the photos attached and the emojis show up as blank squares. ‘Ted came to visit today (blank square). Check out this picture of him (black screen).’ Yeah – I don’t even know if Ted is human let alone how my friend is feeling about him.
 
So I was at Costco recently, stocking up on toilet paper and trail mix (because apparently I need to store enough supplies to survive a zombie apocalypse) and I left with a smart phone. I’m not sure what happened – the whole incident is a blur, not unlike being awakened out of a sound sleep to get hazed for a fraternity.  I recall walking by the cell phone station, holding up my flip phone and saying, “I should probably upgrade. My camera died recently and people keep texting me…” There was a sales lady with a thick accent, she’d ask me questions about what I needed and I would shake my head in confusion and hold up my flip phone. “I have no frame of reference.” I was a cave man at Radio Shack.
 
She would sigh and say, “Okay, okay. Here’s what we do...” Upon looking at the numbers she scribbled on the sheet of scratch paper – it seemed as though this new phone and services would not cost me much more than my current plan, considering the texting fees I was accruing. I needed a new camera anyway, and the carrier was having a big sale. There was a rebate, it was buy one get one free, and I got a free tablet thrown in. Of course that was the last day of the sale and it was near closing time. I needed to make a decision right then. As we proceeded, more things kept getting scribbled on that scratch paper. A start-up fee and of course I needed a protective cover. She suggested insurance, and let me know I had to pay tax for the full price of everything. I remember signing more paperwork than I did when I bought my house. I confess I didn’t take the time to read it all – I left wondering if I had promised them my first born.
 
It was fun playing with my new phone, I must admit. My son helped me customize my ring tone (Paperback Writer – the Beatles). I could emoji like a champ. The voice mail-to-text function was thoroughly entertaining (apparently my name is Andrew and nobody speaks in complete sentences). I could take pictures and videos easily. Mostly it was convenient and I could properly communicate with my friends and family.
 
Then the bill came. I knew it was going to be awful given the flashbacks I was having, but sweet baby Jesus in a diaper! I about had a stroke. As if the sum of all the fees I knew about weren’t bad enough – apparently Sales Lady has an entirely different definition of ‘free’ than I do. When I called to complain, they said if I had bothered to read the fine print I would have known that in order to get my tablet ‘free,’ it was given a phone number. A phone number that came with a start-up fee and monthly bill of its own. There’s a fee if I cancel this number I never knew about, so either way that ‘free’ tablet will end up costing me the full retail value of the tablet. I’m pretty sure that’s the definition of a con. I mean, what reason would I have for turning a tablet into a phone if I just bought a freaking smart phone? I never would have gotten the tablet, especially since I already have one! Silly me, I thought ‘free’ meant it cost me nothing. Either phone carriers like them are falsely advertising or Webster’s needs to update their dictionary.
 
You’re laughing at me right now. You could have told me phone sales are worse than used car sales, because you probably had a similar experience five or more years ago. Seriously, you could have told me.
 
Well, believe me, I have learned my lesson. Next time a sales lady hands me a stack of legal documents to sign, I will read every word and make her sit there and explain it all to me as I go. On second thought – I think I’ll keep this phone until I die. I paid enough for it – it should last that long, right?

This month I’ve invited some of my author friends to post literary inspired recipes on their blogs/websites. So hop along for new recipes to try, new books to read, and a chance to win free stuff!
 
Here’s where to begin:
 
Author J.S. Marlo shares a recipe for Apple Chocolate Chip Muffins from her book, Unearthed – “Shaped by regrets. Bound by duty. Driven by secrets. Rowan's future is jeopardized by the regrets she harbors and the deadly secrets she unearths.”
https://sites.google.com/site/jsmarloauthor/blog-hop 
 
Elizabeth Fountain shares the recipe for Molly the bar owner's irresistible oven-fries from her book
You, Jane - "Once upon a time could ruin Jane's life, or lead her to a happy ending she never expected."
http://wp.me/pWrDR-Ug
 
Author Celia Breslin shares a recipe for Snickerdoodles inspired by her book, Under A Mating Moon – “While visiting her brother in Los Lobos, free-spirited Lexi Luparell is shocked to encounter the Wolf she’d denied when they were teens. Now she must face her guilt for the cruel way she spurned him all those years ago, make amends, and admit the truth. Jake was right all along—they’re meant to mate.”
http://wp.me/p2fl3L-Xk
 
Pippa Jay is sharing a recipe for Time Traveler’s Soup (aka Throw In Anything Vegetable Soup.) a quick, easy, healthy soup recipe inspired by her book Keir – “A demon waiting to die. A woman determined to save him.”
http://pippajay.blogspot.com/2016/06/lets-eat-time-travellers-soup-scifi.html
 
Olga Godim shares her flash story, Hannah's Rugelach, plus a recipe for making rugelach - the Jewish cookies. The story is about love, survival, the Holocaust, and the second chances. And of course, rugelach.
https://olgagodim.wordpress.com/2016/06/01/lets-eat-rugelach/

Susan Stec shares a recipe for a Witchy Tale inspired by her book, Witchy – “Skylar is a good witch with poor relationship choices.”
http://thegratefulundead.blogspot.com/p/blog-page.html
 
Author Joyce Proell shares the recipe for The Best Brownies Ever from her book, A Deadly Truth – “A man obsessed, a woman willing to risk it all…”
http://www.joyceproell.com
 
I am also sharing a recipe for no-bake dragon cookies, from my short story Dragon Cookie – “It’s green; it’s lumpy; it smells like peanut butter and vanilla; and it’s moving.”
http://www.audramiddleton.com/monthly-blog/the-dragon-cookie-an-excerpt

Enter here for a chance to win $15 in Amazon gift cards from Elizabeth Fountain & myself, the ebook A Deadly Truth by Joyce Proell, the ebook Keir by Pippa Jay, the ebook Witchy by Susan Stec, and the ebook Middle Eight by me!
​

I spent most of last year caring for my son as he battled cancer. The only exercise I got was the nervous rocking of a worried mom, which is not enough to burn off those horrific hospital cafeteria meals. As a result, I am currently suffering from a tight wardrobe and a serious case of muffin top. It's time for me to take action. Today I will eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow I begin some serious diet and exercise. And you get to follow my torturous ride!
 
I have chosen the Atkins Diet. Normally my dieting attempts last all of one day, so I figure my best chance at succeeding is a diet that includes all the meat and cheese I can eat.
 
As for exercise, in addition to my exercise bike, I bought myself some dance exercise videos. My dancing is hysterical, so I thought it might make the exercise experience more fun if I’m laughing at myself as I go.
 
Excuse me while I scarf down one last Kit Kat before the pain begins…
 
Day One – This is why I don’t diet. All I can think about is food. Chocolate chip cookies. I can’t stop thinking about Nestle chocolate chip cookies. I’m salivating, literally drooling.
 
Day Two – My exercise video has arrived. Who are these people and why are they so perky? And why do they think I know how to do the 'get busy?' I think that requires an explanation.
 
Day Three – If I’m eating an entire trough of salad, is it really doing me any good? Mightn’t I just as well eat a sandwich? Good grief. I miss bread.
 
Day Four – I just rode my bike for a half an hour. I’m sweating like a cold drink on a hot day and I only burned enough calories to cover that tablespoon of peanut butter I dipped my apple in for lunch. Unreal.
 
Day ?? – Offer me a cupcake right now and you may pull back a bloody stump.
 
Day ‘Are we there yet?’ – The scale isn’t impressed with my efforts, but I feel skinnier. I’m about ready to call it. Good enough.
 
Day ‘Almost used to this’ – I feel kind of like the little engine that could. My pants are no longer cutting off my circulation. I said, “no” to a candy bar without crying. I think I can!
 
Day ‘Oops’ – Ok, this little engine derailed. I love pizza. How many hours on the bike can erase three slices of pepperoni & cheese deliciousness?
 
Day ‘screw it’ – I’m buying bigger pants and blouson shirts. Problem solved.

​I’ve heard that our bodies betray us in our old age.  It’s probably more likely that they are paying us back for every abuse we bestowed upon them in our youth.  I’m not sure what I did to deserve the hormone-induced anxiety attacks I’ve been having lately, maybe it was the 90 percent sugar diet I adhered to in high school, or maybe the three straight years without achieving REM sleep when my kids were babies.  I’m not sure, but all I know is, for my fortieth birthday, my body gave me periodic moments of insanity.
 
It doesn’t always start the same way, but I can be sure it’s going to be a whopper when I start to feel like I am standing on the surface of the sun.  Most people, when being cooked, have the luxury of screaming and flailing about.  Unfortunately, that is not a wise response when it is happening in a shopping mall or at a PTO meeting.  So one must pretend all is well, taking off only as much clothing as is legally permitted for the given situation.
 
Just when I start to get used to the internal combustion, my mind starts thumbing through the rolodex I keep of every mistake I’ve ever made, searching for just the right one on which to fixate.  It can be anything: yelling at my kids in an exorcist voice, an off-hand comment to a friend that might have been taken the wrong way, forgetting to water my boss’s plants when he was on his honeymoon, not returning a phone call… whatever the crime, it is all I can think about.
 
I didn’t just forget to water those plants.  I killed a living thing.  A living thing that provides oxygen for every human being on this planet.  I have single-handedly accelerated global warming.  The world is going to end and it is, without question, all my fault.
 
Now I am usually a rational human being.  When I fixate on something stupid, I can, even in the midst of my anxiety attack, recognize my insanity.  I try to remind myself that forgetting to water plants is not actually a criminal offense.  But then my thoughts take on a whole new angle.  Why did I forget?  Am I coming down with Alzheimer’s?  How long do I have before I’m institutionalized?  Who will look after my kids when I’m gone?  Who will change my diapers?  Where will they bury me?  They’d better cremate me.  I won’t be embalmed.
 
Apparently, these types of attacks are not uncommon among women from 35 to menopaused.  If they get to the point that they disrupt a person’s life, there are many medications doctors can prescribe.  I tried yoga breathing, because breathing can never be a bad thing (unless you’re under water), and herbal remedies, but the best non-prescription cure I found was calling friends and relatives who are kind enough to talk me down without calling the funny farm.  Thank you for that, by the way, people.  In the end I did get a prescription, because when you fixate on something that’s truly stressful (like when your son has cancer), the fear is not easily shaken.
 
The most irritating part of it all is that I was coming to enjoy the one great thing about getting older.  I had shed my neurotic tendencies and realized most problems weren’t terminal.  I was secure in who I was.  And then, the revenge of the endocrine system.  Ah well, it was nice while it lasted.

Audra Middleton here, and I am one of over 100 authors/bloggers on ‘the Little Things Blog Hop!’ Make sure you visit each stop and enter their posted giveaways, be sure to enter the amazing ‘little things’ rafflecopter too, which has a ton of prizes to be won!*

Thanks so much to author CS Myers, for inviting me to be a part of this blog hop. It’s all about appreciating those little things that make life a sweeter.
 
As for me, here’s a few of those little things that make life awesome…
 
Teaching five-year-olds how to make a paper snowflake for the first time – There’s nothing like their delighted coos and the surprise in their eyes when you unfold that paper.
 
Bidding on ebay – It’s competitive shopping. What’s not to love? I mean, besides my credit card bill.
 
Playing air guitar to Juke Box Hero – Everytime. Got stars in my eyes, baby.
 
A good twist – There’s nothing more satisfying than an exciting twist that brings the whole story together.
 
The Shamrock shake - I don’t know if it’s the entirely unnatural green color, or just the fact that it’s only available one month per year, but it’s enough to make me ditch the diet and pop a blood vessel trying to get that minty goodness up the straw.
 
The meadowlark’s song – It’s cheerful, but not in an annoying way.
 
Striped socks – Everything’s better with stripes.
 
When embarrassing things happen to me – it makes for awesome blog material.

And now, hop on!

Visit Spreading the Word next: https://www.facebook.com/Spreading-The-Word-113263318845485/?fref=ts

Join the Little Things Blog Hop Event for more fun https://www.facebook.com/events/562506680576207/

Here's the link to all the Blog Hop spots:  http://theclubbookpromotions.blogspot.com/2016/02/LittleThingsBlogHop.html

Thank you for hopping by!

*Winner (s) will be chosen by random and announced on this page and on the Little Things Event Page by April 6th.
FB is not in any way responsible or affiliated with this giveaway or the Little Things Blog Hop.

Be sure to enter these Rafflecopter Giveaways: ​

My herofest is drawing to a close here on my blog, but not before we meet another hunk! Be sure to enter the giveaway & vote for your favorites, too! And now, here's Celia Breslin and her hero, Jake Marsden, from her book Under A Mating Moon.

Hi Everyone!
 
Nice to be back for another visit to Audra’s blog! I’ve brought Wolf shifter and Awesome Sauce DJ Jake Marsden with me today. He’s agreed to answer a few questions.
 
Celia:  Hi, Jake! Thanks for taking a break from your current DJ tour to join me chez Audra. First off, tell us: What’s your idea of the perfect date?
 
Jake:  I spend a lot of time in clubs, converted warehouses, and other performance venues, so when I’m off work, I like to spend time outdoors. I’m not much of a camper, so my perfect date would be dinner at a restaurant with outdoor seating, a conversation that didn’t involve talking about my work, a walk around town or the local park, then perhaps a soak in a hot tub, followed by… ::Jake shifts in his chair and shoots a crooked grin::
 
Celia:  Sounds lovely. What gift would you give your love for Valentine’s Day & why?
 
Jake:   I’m a DJ but also a classically trained pianist and composer, so I’d compose a song for my love. Music is the language of my heart, and a Valentine gift should always come from the heart.
 
Celia: Sounds perfect!  Speaking of perfection, what’s your greatest flaw?
 
Jake:  ::narrows his eyes::  I can hold a grudge for a very long time.
 
Celia: Yikes, remind me not to get on your bad side.  So then, what’s your greatest strength?
 
Jake: I’m an Alpha Wolf, so it’s in my nature to protect those who are weaker than myself.
 
Celia: You rock! Okay, last question… If they were to make a movie of your life, what genre would it be?
 
Jake: Since I’m a Wolf shifter, and one female has dominated my heart and thoughts for most of my life--even when we were apart--I’d have to say Paranormal Romance.
 
Celia:  Thanks for the chat, Jake. And on behalf of both of us, thank you Audra for hosting us today! Bye for now, everyone!
 
So glad to have you here! And now, more about Under A Mating Moon:
  
British Alpha wolf Jake Marsden spends his days among humans, pursuing a lucrative music career and avoiding his pack’s politics. When his current DJ tour takes him to the US, he stops in Los Lobos to visit family, and runs into the one Wolf he never wants to see again—the mate who rejected his claim.
 
While visiting her brother in Los Lobos, free-spirited Lexi Luparell is shocked to encounter the Wolf she’d denied when they were teens. Now she must face her guilt for the cruel way she spurned him all those years ago, make amends, and admit the truth. Jake was right all along—they’re meant to mate.
 
Lexi would love to explore the mate concept and her overwhelming attraction to virile, alpha Wolf Jake, but he wants nothing to do with her. How can she break down his defenses when she’s the reason he built them in the first place?
 
Jake dates only human women now. Lexi had her shot at being his mate, and she threw it away. But when her life is threatened, he may have to rethink his position and do whatever it takes to claim his one true mate.
 
Under A Mating Moon is #27 in a multi-author, shared world series: Black Hills Wolves, by Decadent Publishing.  It is a stand-alone read (no prior reading in series required).
 
Buy Links:
 
AllRomance - https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-underamatingmoon-1875162-340.html
 
Amazon - http://www.amazon.com/Under-Mating-Moon-Black-Wolves-ebook/dp/B0148W4RHW
 
Barnes & Noble - http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/under-a-mating-moon-celia-breslin/1122668180
 
BookStrand - http://www.bookstrand.com/under-a-mating-moon
 
Kobo - https://store.kobobooks.com/en-US/ebook/under-a-mating-moon
 
iTunes - https://itunes.apple.com/nz/book/under-a-mating-moon/id1044688654?mt=11
 
 
Find Celia on Social Media:
 
Web site: http://www.celiabreslin.com/
 
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/celiabreslin
 
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/CeliaBreslinAuthor
 
Goodreads: http://www.goodreads.com/CeliaBreslin
 
Pinterest: http://www.pinterest.com/celiabreslin/
 
Newsletter: http://eepurl.com/bxqwRL
 
Amazon Author Central: http://amazon.com/author/celiabreslin

The herofest is still going strong here on my blog! Speaking of strong, let's hear from our latest hero, from Adventures of a Young Girl by J P Lundstrom.

Alexander Buchanan (known as Sandy to his friends) is Roberta Blevins’ best friend in Adventures of a Young Girl. He’s her constant companion in high school, seeing her through some very tough times. He’s her coworker, her steady date, and her shoulder to cry on. But what he isn’t, she insists, is her boyfriend. Let’s hear his thoughts.

Tell us, Sandy, what’s your idea of the perfect date?

First of all, she’d have to be a girl I really cared about. I never dated until I met Roberta; she was my first date, and I guess I messed up. I was really nervous and afterward, she wouldn’t go out with me again. But we got back together later on. She’s a beautiful girl and she loves to dance, so I’ve taken her to a lot of dances. We’ve had a lot of study dates, but my favorite way to spend a date is holding her in my arms and kissing her. I love the way she goes all soft and cuddly.

What gift would you give your love for Valentine’s Day & why?

You’ve got to keep your ears and eyes open all year long. You can’t just buy a girl a box of candy--that’s thoughtless. If you’ve been listening to her, you know what she really likes, or maybe she’s told you her secret wish. That’s what you give her. It means something to her, because she knows you’ve been paying attention and you care.

What’s your greatest flaw?

My greatest flaw is not being able to express how I feel. I wasn’t able to express to my dad and granddad what I wanted to do with my life. They forced me into a life I never wanted, and I had to leave everything behind. If I had been able to tell them what I really wanted, things might have been different.

What’s your greatest strength?

Well, I’m pretty strong physically, but I don’t think that’s what you mean. People don’t say much about this unless you’re a Marine, but I’d have to say it’s my dedication. When I find something that’s worth going after, I’ll move heaven and earth to get it and keep it. 

If they were to make a movie of your life, what genre would it be?

(laughs) I guess it would have to be action-adventure. First to show all the trouble I used to get into and the many times I ran away from home as a kid, then my work at the Double L with the horses, and then the years of my military career. Sounds exciting, doesn’t it?

Absolutely! Here's more about Adventures of a Young Girl:

It’s 1957, and Roberta Blevins is just about done with the eighth grade. She’s ready to grow up. She has big plans for her life, and she needs lots of information.  What she really want to know about is S-E-X, and sixteen-year-old Carl is happy to oblige. And that’s just her first adventure!

She’s got a long way to go from Rockdale, Texas to Hollywood, California and the Pacific Ocean, but she’s bound and determined to get there. On the way, she’ll have a ton of adventures and get to know a lot of people. Everybody loves Roberta—she’s cute, fun and irrepressible.

And along the way, she’ll learn that not all adventures are happy—some are dangerous, deadly and discouraging. Join Roberta on her quest to get to Hollywood and the movies and to fulfill her lifelong desires.

Learn more about JP Lundstrom and her books:
 
Adventures of a Young Girl on Pinterest  www.pinterest.com/writerjplundstr/adventures-of-a-young-girl-1957-1961/
Roberta Blevins’ Facebook page www.facebook.com/Roberta-Blevins-1651170898435513/
 
Buy the book here: 
http://www.amazon.com/Adventures-Young-Girl-J-Lundstrom-ebook/dp/B019X6INWI/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1452973708&sr=1-1&keywords=j+p+lundstrom
or
 
https://read.amazon.com/kp/embed?asin=B019X6INWI&preview=newtab&linkCode=kpe&ref_=cm_sw_r_kb_dp_1CtQwb06W2MQ7

The herofest continues here on my blog! Today Susan Stec's hot hero, Gaire, is stopping by. Don't forget to enter the giveaway!

​Hi! I’m Joyce Proell, and I write historical romance and mystery.
 
I’m delighted to be here today. Thanks, Audra, for hosting.
 
Joining me today is one of the lead characters of my ‘Truth’ series. My hunky hero is Doyle Flanagan, a self-made millionaire living in Chicago of 1881. While solving the odd murder caper, he doggedly pursues his love interest, the spirited Cady Delafield. 
 
Just to set the record straight, the word hunk or hunky wasn’t used in the 1880’s to portray a sexy, attractive man. More often hunk denoted a side of beef—literally. In those times, a woman might say a man was striking or devilishly handsome. He might be bold and fierce. Or seductive. Tempting. Desirable. All these labels fit Doyle.
 
As I say this, he’s frowning. In spite of all his achievements—his success in business and his generosity to those less fortunate, he’s terribly humble. But please, let’s allow him to speak for himself. Here are a few questions.
 
Doyle, what’s your idea of a perfect man? 
 
Personal perfection doesn’t exist. I recognized this early on, and didn’t spin my wheels trying to attain the unachievable. What’s important is integrity. Give a man character, and he will go far, exceeding the bounds of mediocrity and petty society.   
 
What would you give your love for Valentine’s Day? 
 
I regret to say, I’ve only known Cady Delafield for six months. February was not one of those months. However, my love is a woman who inspires romance. I couldn’t help but surprise her with small tokens of affection. A book of poems by Keats, a silk scarf, chocolates, cookies—yes, she has a sweet tooth. A sapphire and diamond engagement ring brought her to tears. Ha! She didn’t see that one coming! Yet by far, she says her favorite gifts were all the personally written love notes included with each present. She’s kept each one, locked away in a box tied with a ribbon, treasures to be cherished forever.     
 
What’s your greatest flaw? 
 
Flaw? Pardon me while I smile. It’s been suggested I spend too many hours at work. My reply: One never gets to the top of the mountain without great sacrifice and work.
 
What’s your greatest strength?
 
Confidence. Though my detractors call it arrogance. Living without fear of failure allows me to forge ahead, sometimes recklessly, but always with the belief that I can succeed so long as I try and keep striving.
 
Thank you, Doyle, for your candid answers. And thank you readers for joining us today.
 
If you want to read more about Cady and Doyle, you can find them here:
 
Amazon: 
http://preview.tinyurl.com/hw6focb
 
Champagne Books: http://champagnebooks.com/store/index.php?controller=search&orderby=position&orderway=desc&search_query=Joyce+Proell
 
Connect with me on Facebook:
http://www.facebook/JoyceProellAuthor
 
http://www.twitter.com @jproell1